The DOKAWGAQW Show
by Goodnight Goodnight
Summary: It's my first attempt to write anything that even resembles a WoT fic, much less a humorous one, so go easy on me! Please R&R. If you do I will make more! This is a show the Dark One hosts.


The DOKAWGAQW Show  
  
A/N: My first try at writing a WoT fanfic, much less a humorous WoT fanfic, so don't blame me if it's worse than the worse thing you ever read. Disclaimer: No WoT characters belong to me. Furbies do not belong to me either. Neither do turtles. Or the little paperclip guy who is right now giving me some really annoying advice. die! DIIIEEEE! AAAARGH!!  
  
Dark One: WELCOME to the Dark-One-Kills-Anyone-Who-Gets-A-Question-Wrong Show!!! I'm your host, Shai'tan!!!  
  
*Women in audience faint from that name. Oh, and the little spark thingies that have been coming out of his eyes and mouth.*  
  
Dark One: Ummm. Yeah.  
  
*Turns them into Furbies*  
  
Dark One: So, on with the show!! Today's guests will all be Aes Sedai!!! So give a long, loud "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!" for these people!  
  
Moraine: Hey that's mean!!!  
  
Director: They're not supposed to see you yet! Get back! *dives on her*  
  
D.O. (Dark One): Ummm. *coughs* so anyhow, our contestants today are Moraine Damodred!  
  
Human Audience: BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!  
  
Furby Audience: Do-de-do-de-do-de-do!!!! *do little Furby dance*  
  
D.O.: We also have the current Amyrlin seat, Egwene Al'Vere.  
  
H.A.: BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!  
  
F.A.: *is channeled out the window by Moraine, Egwene and Ny. I mean the mystery-person-who-Shai'tan-has-not-yet-said-anything-about.* WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Mystery-person-who-Shai'tan-has-not-yet-said-anything-about: Hey! You could at least call me by my name!  
  
Narrator: Take it or leave it, Nyn. I mean mystery-person-who-Shai'tan-has- not-yet-said-anything-about.  
  
Mystery-person-who-Shai'tan-has-not-yet-said-anything-about: Ummm. *glances at Shai'tan* Leaving might not be such a bad idea. *starts running away*  
  
Narrator: *stops her with all powerful Narrator powers* You come back here!  
  
D.O.: Can we just get back to the show??  
  
Everyone: Yes!  
  
D.O.: Okay. Our last guess is Nynaeve Al'Maera!!!  
  
Audience: BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!  
  
*Lan pops up and starts killing everyone. His newly bought cell phone rings, and he goes outside to answer it. At that moment the audience's section explodes from saidin, saidar, Narrator power and Furby Power. *  
  
Particularly Crazy Member of Audience (Me!): When Furbies attack. Dun-dun- dun.  
  
D.O.: Ummm. Yeah. There goes our audience.  
  
Aes Sedai: Get on with it!!!!!  
  
D.O.: Okay, okay. light! Errr, I mean dark. Ummm. So anyhow, every contestant will answer one question. The first to get one wrong, dies. Each question is worth 100 points, except for bonuses which are worth 200. At the end of the game you win your points times 100 silver pieces!!!  
  
Moraine: Just silver? Light, you're cheap!!!  
  
D.O.: Take it or leave it!  
  
Moraine: Okay. *gets up and tries to leave, but Shai'tan kills her first*  
  
D.O.: Okay, now we have TWO contestants. So, the first question is for Egwene.  
  
Egwene: Finally!  
  
D.O.: The first question is, name three types of "powers".  
  
Egwene: Ummm, saidin, saidar, and, ummm. Narrator Power?  
  
D.O.: *gives her the Evil Eye (which is REALLY evil with Shai'tan doing it)* *mutters* Blood and bloody. *stops muttering* Correct. You get 100 points.  
  
Egwene: Yayness!!! (A/N: It's my word! :))  
  
Everyone: *stares at her weirdly*  
  
Egwene: Humph.  
  
D.O.: Next, it's Nynaeve's turn!!! Your question is, whose idea was it to make that paperclip guy??  
  
Nynaeve: Light! How would I know?  
  
D.O.: Just kidding. Your question is, where is Shara??  
  
Nynaeve: Shara is the land on the other side of the Aiel Waste.  
  
D.O.: *mutters* Argh. *stops muttering* Yeah, yeah, you're right. You get 100 points. The next question is for Egwene. The question is, what material do people get from Shara?  
  
Egwene: I think it might be silk? (A/N: Don't blame me if this is wrong, I THINK it's right, but I'm not sure, and I'm too lazy to go check.)  
  
D.O.: AAAAAH!!! STOP GETTING QUESTIONS RIGHT!!!!!  
  
Egwene: AAAH!!! RUN AWAY!!! *tries to run away but is stopped by immensely strong Narrator Power*  
  
Narrator: Hey, you can't run away! The show can't end yet! It's only 600 words long, and it NEEDS to be at LEAST 1000 words long!  
  
Egwene: Why?  
  
Nynaeve: Yeah, why stop me from winning??  
  
Narrator: Umm, because I feel like it.  
  
Egwene and Nynaeve: Oh.  
  
Narrator: And also because almost all the other fanfics are longer than what I usually write! *sniff* but you wouldn't understand.  
  
Egwene and Nynaeve: Oh.  
  
Narrator: Stop saying that!  
  
Egwene and Nynaeve: *evil grins* Oh. Okay.  
  
Narrator: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Egwene and Nynaeve: heh-heh-heh.  
  
D.O.: Let's just get on with the show! Who's up next?  
  
*Egwene and Nynaeve both point to the other one*  
  
D.O.: Okay then. Well since neither of you will tell me whose turn it is, I will just pick a person's name out of a hat. *go gets hat, two pices of paper and a pencil from the director* Okay. Let's see, here's Egwene's piece *shows piece of paper* and here's Nynaeve's piece *shows pice of paper*. Happy??  
  
*Egwene and Nynaeve glare at each other then nod*  
  
D.O.: *sticks paper in hat and shuffles papers up* Okay. Egwene will go next!  
  
Egwene: That's not fair! I went last!!!  
  
Nynaeve: *grins evily*  
  
D.O.: Too bad. Nobody cares.  
  
Egwene: Except me!  
  
D.O.: So what. So anyhow, your question is, what does avron mean?  
  
Egwene: Ummm. AAAAH! I DON'T KNOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
D.O.: Is that your final answer?  
  
Egwene: AAAAAAAH!!!!!!! I DON'T KNOW!!!!!  
  
D.O.: Incorrect!!! The correct answer is avron means watchers!!! YOU LOOSE!!!  
  
Egwene: NOOOOOOOOO!!!!! *tries to run away but is struck dead by True Power*  
  
Nynaeve: I wiiiiiiin! I wiiiiiiin!!!! Hehehehehehehehe!!!!  
  
D.O.: Correct! You win. umm. 1000 silver pieces!  
  
Nynaeve: Yay!  
  
D.O.: That's the end of our show. Thanks for watching! Tune in next time to see which of three Aiel die!!!  
  
A/N: Well, it's not the best thing ever written, but it's not bad. Don't forget to click the review button, don't worry, it won't explode!!! Also, if you liked this and you like Harry Potter, I have another couple of stories like these. Check them out if you want, and if you don't, then. too bad for me. 


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